Will I ever get over it?

Photo of a new sprout growing out of a log

To me the question implies we can just get back to our lives the way they were before the death, and in that sense we don’t get over it. Grief is so much more complicated that that.

To me the question implies we can just get back to our lives the way they were before the death, and in that sense we don’t get over it. Grief is so much more complicated that that.

We are irrevocably changed by a death (or any other kind of loss) and we we don’t get to go back. Accepting that is key to what we can do which is heal, even though healing leaves its scars.

The task of grieving is not about going back or getting over it. It’s about finding a new normal and investing in life again, scars and all.

Do we forget the person who died? Of course not. When grief has really resolved, we carry them with us with love and joy and occasional sadness, but our lives no longer revolve around the loss.

Photo Credit: steph p

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