In the first few weeks and months of grief we experience numbness and shock. Just like the body’s physical reaction to trauma we go into shock, our psyches protect us from experiencing the full reality of a death. This is how it’s supposed to be. It’s how we’re wired and thank goodness for that. Rather …
Healing means becoming whole. Period. End of story. It does not mean returning to a previous state of being as I heard someone say on the radio the other day. All it means is becoming whole. After the experience of death and the grief that follows, that wholeness will be dramatically different from what we …
Is there a difference between “trying to be strong” and choosing to grieve privately? In our culture, we are applauded for “being strong” after we’ve experienced a profound loss. We actually get a tremendous about of approval for being strong in the face of any kind of pain. So rather than allowing ourselves to be …
This is such an wonderful description of the anger of grief… As I grew older, I realized this thing I’d been alternately dealing with and avoiding was grief, and probably anger. Logically, I knew it didn’t make sense to be angry. It was no one’s fault. She didn’t choose this. But I was still mad …
Does grief have a purpose other than to make us miserable? Is there a relationship between grief and healing? I believe there is. In fact I believe the grieving process is the means by which we heal and without it we are left living a life that resembles a twilight sleep. In this excerpt from …
Learning to trust the grieving process is one of the harder lessons of grief but once learned it makes everything so much easier. Photo Credit: DrewbieDoo via photo pin cc
I’ve been getting a lot of emails recently about grief and regret. Honestly I’ve never known anyone not to have some regrets during the grieving process, so I recorded this video addressing some of the most common kinds of would’ves, should’ves, could’ves. In a recent survey, anger, regrets and guilt were at the top of …
Grief and Regret: The Would’ves, Should’ves, Could’ves Read More »
It’s okay to fall apart! Death shatters us on so many levels that our natural reaction is often to try to hold everything together. We try to be strong. We try to stay positive. We try to go on. It’s totally understandable, and we all do it to a certain extent. The problem is that …
One of the things that makes grieving so difficult is that we feel like we’re drowning in it. Every time we manage to come up for air, it feels like there’s an invisible hand ready, willing and able to push us under the surface again. When swimming in that murky water, it is extremely difficult …
In the Midst of Grieving – Rediscover Perspective and Connection Read More »
In grieving circles, people rail against any hint of pressure to move on, and rightly so. In our culture there is tremendous pressure on those who are grieving to get over it quickly with as little fuss as possible. In response to this pressure, many folks dig in, pulling their cloak of grief around them …